My spiritual journey a work in progress

I’m 44 years old. It started with my Dad. All he ever prayed for was the truth. He studied the bible, Torah, ancient history and civilizations. His idea was that you couldn’t really understand the bible if you didn’t understand the people who wrote it. As he studied I soon discovered that many cultures had been whipped out or intentionally assimilated to the christian religion. He was intensely interested in ufo’s. He was alive during the Roswell incident. We would pour over the hieroglyphs from Egypt. We noticed the skulls of the pharaohs of Egypt had strange shaped skulls. He questioned the rapture in the bible, he just couldn’t wrap his head around it. The Powers That Be gave him an out of body experience, that made the rapture something he could understand. While he searched for material proof, I hungered for a more personal experience of what religions was supposed to give. Jesus said he came to complete. He had the power to heal. And he promised that we would be able to do even more then he.

I grew up in a independent Baptist home. They are very rigid in what they believe. A friend of my mothers drew astrology chats. Each time I was at her house, and my mother came over, she would hurriedly put her stuff away. I was too scared of my mother to let myself use that opportunity. When I became a young adult, I escaped my mother’s reign and started going to a charismatic church. Even though I heard the angels sing there, there was still something off. They still believed that any other knowledge was evil.

When my father and I studied together, we looked briefly into the fall of man and the nephillim. It was explained to me that the esoteric arts came from these fallen angels. I hungered to know what life was like at that time. I was cautioned and warned about using astrology, tarot, any kind of divination. The experiences in the charismatic church and my own background of childhood abuse make me hunger to have to ability to heal other peoples lives. I was chased away because of my ability to know when a person had been abused. I also was able with much effort to recognize a predator.

After the break from the charismatic Christians I explored wicca. I was really wanting to learn about my Native American history. That was in the early days of the internet and not much was available. Although I was learning the true atrocities of the white people on indigenous cultures.